Finding Myself in Motherhood

I want to start off by saying everything I’m about to say is by no means dismissing any other mom’s experience or their outlook on motherhood. I understand that I have a wonderful support system and am pretty privileged because of that. I am writing this to share my personal experience and to offer a different perspective on something I’ve seen so much about online. There is no right or wrong way to feel about motherhood! Everyone’s journey is unique and different and I can only speak to my experience. 

I’ve seen so much online about losing yourself in motherhood. Becoming so lost in the identity of “mom” that you realize you have nothing else. The only things you do revolve around your children. You wake up one day realizing your closet is full of character t-shirts and you don’t have any of your own hobbies. I can fully understand this and empathize with that feeling as there have been many moments like this in my journey. Sometimes I realize the only thing I can think to talk about is my son and then I wonder what real world events are happening that I have no clue about. 

With that being said, that’s actually not how I feel the majority of the time. Most of the time, I feel quite comfortable and happy in my current situation. I enjoy being in this little bubble and don’t mind the things I’m “missing out on.” I feel like I’ve actually found myself in motherhood. So what about those moms? What about the ones who realize this is literally just what they’ve been waiting for…and no I don’t mean that in an anti-feminist way. I actually mean it in the most feminist way possible! I’ve never felt more empowered than I do now that I’m a mom. 

Finding Myself in Motherhood

I seriously don’t know how else to say this, except that I really believe I found myself in motherhood. I feel more confident, proud, and sure of myself with this new title of “mom” than I ever have in my entire life. Sometimes I wonder why this is or where this came from but then I remind myself…not only did I grow this little person with my own body, but then I pushed him out of me. I fed him with the milk my body created just for him and now I have the beautiful privilege of taking care of him everyday. Maybe it’s because I’m responsible for someone else now, but I feel so much more sure of my life and my decisions than ever before. I know it’s my most important job to love and protect him. 

Ways I’ve found myself in Motherhood 

• My confidence has gone up so much! I grew and birthed a whole human and if I can do that I can do anything. 
• Accepting that I’m a homebody. My favorite thing to do is stay home. It’s where we’re most comfortable and there’s plenty of fun things to be done here. 
• I feel like I have a bigger purpose. I don’t mind being defined as a “mom”… I am one and I love that. 
• My self esteem has increased! My baby and husband think I’m the best and their opinions are the only ones that matter.
• I’m more secure in my decisions. I feel happier and more solidified in the choices I make. 

Now, of course I’m not saying it’s easy for me! Is it hard? Am I tired? Is it isolating?… Yes! Are there days when I need a break? Of course!…

But that stuff doesn’t take away from the fact that I love this new mom version of myself. So, shout out to all the moms who are finding themselves in motherhood! Becoming a mom can bring out the best in people. It gives you a new sense of self, a rightfully earned level of confidence, and the wonderful feeling of knowing that you really are amazing!